if you arent in canada because the AD IS FUCKING GEO LOCKED!!!!!
No, you see, I don't think you quite understand. If you grab the bottom of the handle when you go to the housekeeping closet in the back, it is a spot free from the germs of others. Everyone else, sensible as they are, grabs the middle of the handle, so I am the only one reaching down to grab the bottom when someone asks me for towels. It keeps me decontaminated when I have to do my job (as opposed to the usual dicking around, playing snake, reading about sports, etc.)
On Sportsnet, they are running this advertisement where Connor McDavid, arguably the greatest active hockey player, sits down in a red chair, accompanied by a red cup of coffee in a perfectly lit room, and talks about his deep dismay towards the idea that teenagers are spending upwards of five hours a day on their phones. Besides the frequency of the ad when I am watching hockey streams, which I do obviously find somewhat humorous, the understated emotionality of the entire thing is really something to behold. Connor McDavid looks genuinely hurt at this idea that teenagers are using Tiktok instead of messaging their friends to play hockey in the alleys. The poor guy, the top point scorer of 2026, is so hurt by this realization. His living is made by crossing up ice skaters--
--Oh great. Look at that. My peaceful bubble of musing relating to my second favorite Edmonton Oiler1 has been cut short because a father from the high school wrestling team at the hotel decided to pay cash for five beers. Look at that, now I have to hold this cash and put it in the drawer, touch as little as possible from the surrounding area, and then go to the back to sanitize my hands. My GM made a comment last week saying he was considering giving up the use of cash payments, a move that will piss everyone off, but at this point I do not care too much about it, because that means I will have to touch less cash. It’s a deep adoration for the analog, until it causes me even the most minor inconvenience. Does that make me a hypocrite? Maybe. But have you ever watched a video on youtube about analog technology made by someone who is spending a ton of money on classic ipods and handheld dvd players? Did you guys forget that the main reason we got into this was cost effectiveness? Is anyone else listening or am I speaking into --
--The humor of the sportsnet ad comes from the dichotomy of playing in the most violent American sport and opposing it with the quiet contemplation of McDavid in such a sensitive environment. The quiet timbre of his voice is the main point of emphasis, I can see him sitting at his desk, incense lit, Christmastime candle ablaze, journaling down while Nick Drake plays from his little record player2. What is Connor McDavid’s biggest fear, but mainly, how does he want to change the world? Like Holden Caufield at the end of the cliff saving all the children from falling off, but instead of that cliff he sits in his Rogers sponsored chair.
Excuse me for emasculating and potentially infantilizing a hockey player, but isn’t that what we are doing in popular media? The toxicity of the masculinity in hockey is one of the major problems, so no wonder we are putting McDavid in the comfy chair to level with teenagers, no wonder the biggest show in america this year was a gay hockey drama.
This is an edit to a Sombr song about all time Maple Leaf Auston Matthews and current axis power member Mitch Marner. It cherry picks clips to exemplify their deteriorating relationship after their trade. It made me really sad. I step back to realize I am watching two men who come from one of the most toxic and horrific internal sports culture interact in this way that feels more like a breakup than that event that requires you to break teeth in the pursuit of playoff goals. I think some of it is the feminine hockey fanbase that has gained more prominence (and with arms wide open, I may add) and some of it is the idea that we need Hockey to be less controversial and toxic for it to continue to make money. The days of the enforcer are long behind us. I’m glad. I’m really happy I can talk about how Jet Greaves is a sweetie pie without feeling the side eye of judgement cast my way.
Poor guy just came up to the front desk with his kid, 8 hours on the road, and Marriott let him book a stay in our sold out hotel. Literally nothing I can do, there is not a single available room left in the hotel. MARSHA strikes again.
1 - My favorite Edmonton Oiler is obviously Wayne Gretzky. I mean on a political basis, clearly not, because he is a Canadian who loves trump (which seems completely absurd) but if we are vetting the political views of Hockey players, there are no hockey players we can enjoy. I love him because he is the goat, and reading through his wikipedia page makes me really emotional. He was just so clearly amazing from such a young age, and he won the MVP so many times in a row that it really makes you wonder if he can ever be topped. In many ways the "Tiger Woods" of hockey.
2 - well look at that apparently Connor McDavid is a huge Nickelback fan. actually his GQ Interview is really cute, he talks about how excited he is for his wedding and how he went to a tailor in montreal to make sure "his boys" look good for his big day. Maybe he is contemplating while listening to All The Right Reasons
3 - The most horrible disgusting ugly link embed I have ever witnessed let me to putting a straight link to the edit on instagram itself. I would usually avoid instagram but it was truly the only place I could find this video (well, after about 2 minutes of searching. I am not going to the ends of youtube to find a fucking hockey edit). The embed was so bad, and the worst part is the video did not even show up. it just said "open in instagram to view". What the fuck is the point in linking something if you need an account. If you need a link to the edit just message me and I will send it to you. This is fucking ridiculous.